Brittany Rebecca Helton

Happy Valentine’s Day!

by on Feb.14, 2011, under Thoughts and Feelings

Today is Valentine’s Day, and while I feel that my life is pretty much back on track, I cannot help but think about you every second of every day. I don’t care that I don’t have your things surrounding me. I don’t care that I can’t walk into your bedroom and touch the things that meant the most to you. All I care about is that I have you in my thoughts and in my heart. You and your sisters are my purpose for living and for loving, but I feel like a piece of me is gone every time I think about you. I have your pictures all around me, just like I always have. I can see your face when I look at your tiniest sister.¬†She looks so much like you. It makes me feel as though you are here with us still. I know that she is not you, and I would never put that on her, but I cannot help but see you in her every time I look at her. I have always thought that she was a mini you. I wish you had the chance to get to know both of your baby sisters. They are such amazing little people. So loving and so beautiful.

I adore you. I still cannot believe that you are gone. I think its ridiculous that people think they are the only ones that are suffering because you are no longer with us. People act as if they are the only ones with broken hearts and heads that are full of thoughts of you. If only that were true. If only the ones that were responsible for you no longer being here were the only ones that were suffering then all would be right in the world. Unfortunately, that is not the case.